25th october 2020

12:22pm

i keep having a lot of ideas for my already busy life, like things i want to do/make/learn/build.
where do i even start with putting these in any sort of priority??? i've tried a bit. from things that will benefit me most (1) to those which might not so much (12)

great tier 1-4
1. paint more, pushing my skills
yes. this is what i need to do. i miss it, i miss practicing and painting and seeing what else i can push myself to learn. i love painting and i love going to galleries to see paintings, i would love to improve this skill because it's something i am passionate about.

2. learn to draw/improve my drawings & x-post my drawings on a daily accountability site
this will improve my painting skill as being able to draw goes hand in hand with paintng. i was never taught formally so this will benefit me greatly. the second part, about posting it on a daily accountability site maybe not so much - would this just add stress and pressure to an already full schedule? surely to go at my own pace would be a bit better. i could always just post my drawings on social media.

3. complete an online oil painting class
the class i'm taking (a series of videos really) is just a different way of painting - limited palette, more refined brush strokes, etc. i have learnt a lot through this class and i would like to finish it and perhaps take more! i would love to see how the things in this class will come through in my own work.

4. get back into my work as an artist, similar to what i did during my masters
i did enjoy the academic side of the masters, learning about theories and applying them to my own work. i would like to explore and learn more about how online identity can be explored in art, in particularly painting (or if it can?). painting people i've never met, etc

good tier 5-8
5. research and prepare for further courses/education/training because of new job being a 12 month contract
so my contract is a 12 month contract ending in august next year, which sucks because i really enjoy this job. i'm not sure which courses i would need to look at - obviously there are optional internal training courses i can partake in, but further training might have to be specific for my next job role. education wise would probably be a PGCE or a route in to teaching at a higher education level? which is PhD, where point number 4 would come into play.

6. read relevent artist literature/post internet art journals
this is for number 4 and 5 - this would help me grow as an artist with a solid grounding to my work, and help me if i were to go on to pursue PhD or further education. it'll help me when talking about my art too to other people/colleagues etc.

7. host art workshops / clubs at my new job - which is full time
i'm very excited for this - it will help me build my 'education' portfolio (again, further education blah blah), increase my confidence, and get me painting again with other people in tow! the clubs are the accountability - can't run a sketchbook club if i don't keep up with my sketchbook, can't have a drawing display if i don't draw, can't host painting workshops if i don't paint. hahah. going back to the innocence of gcse/a-level things too, using similar materials, time frames and even the same sketchbooks we used back in the day is very inspiring somehow.

8. post more of my art on instagram (got to MAKE the art first before i can even post it)
why? because i like showing my progress (bad and good) to others. my account is private, so i don't have to focus on hashtags or anything right now, which might be nice! less pressure, i can just post what i want, when i want.

meh tier 8-12
9. more of this website :)
keeping some sort of reflective journal about things i'm doing and things i've done could really set things into perspective for me. even typing this out, that no one will probably read, feels good. i look forward to having a spare afternoon when i can make a new layout and code it all up nicely. webdesign like this did get me into art, and i feel the creativity is a positive thing. it's not top of the list, but it's there.

10. i want to learn japanese and keep a learning journal
this is a nice idea, i tried learning bits of japanese a year ago and it worked - i recognise some hiragana and phrases on ingredients/subtitles/anime etc, however i don't think i plan on visiting japan for a while. it's on the bucket list, however i don't think i would live there to a point where learning the language would be necessary. this might be something i do for 5 mins a day on my lunch break on duolingo or something. it's not a priority.

11. learn to play the ukelele
similar to learning japanese, it's a cute idea. the ukelele is a really sweet instrument! and it would be nice to learn somethnig musical. however, the time you have to put in to practicing and pursuing it clashes with my other creative goals. maybe in the future. but not today.

12. build a tamagotchi hatch-log website
this is just a sweet little mini-site idea i had a while ago. keeping track of my tamagotchi's progress hour by hour.
there's instagram for this, and a niche one at that.

that was a load off my chest. if you're reading this, thank you.

15th october 2020

10:44pm

productive things i did today
-brushed my teeth (twice)
-did my makeup
-went to work
-arranged a repair for the laser cutter
-did a good job assisting with the clay lesson
-ate a good lunch
-put up a display over in the opposite building
-did a handful of emails
-washed my hair
-roughly updated trello with all the other stuff floating around that i need to do

phew

26th june 2020

8:05pm

wewwww. it's so hot out lately.
well, i began work a few weeks ago! it's nice to be back in the swing of things, although it's a challenge trying to balance work alongside all the other habits / things i got on top of during lockdown. things like drawing practice, job hunting, house work etc. i guess it's just another challenge to take on. it's not too stressful at work right now, so it's even nicer. very stress-free! so i'm quite happy it's a 'small' addition to the list of things i have to do, something that isn't gonna leave me stressed out and tired at the end of the day so soon. i'm happy where i am right now, which dosen't mean it's time to sit back and relax, i still need to push myself to apply to new jobs, i need to take this easy period as an opportunity to improve myself.

things to do before work tomorrow:
-practice drawing a bit more
-clean my makeup brushes
-do some laundry
-buy cosrx bha blackhead power liquid

p.s: i would like to get a new layout done for this website! feelin inspiredddd

7th june 2020

11:35pm

do you ever just get real tired of trying to convince people that other human beings are also worthy of love and respect

because i fucking do

3rd june 2020

7:04am

i start back at work on monday, that is if everything goes to plan. i am excited, nervous, kinda not looking forward to it? i dunno. i would love a new job that would help me get to the next stage in my life, moving out, getting a place with my boyfriend, all that junk. but having to give up my studio, stop volunteering, all the extra stuff i like to do with me only being part time? it is kinda scary. i guess i got too comfortable in the position i am in right now, so thinking of anything diffrently is hard. also, my boyfriend has made a lot of sacrifices and life changes so we can eventully move in, it would be selfish of me to drag my feet in getting to the next step, if that makes sense.

in websitey news, i have been pretty much concentrating entirely on my piczo project heheh. i moved it to its own standalone website! so go check that out:)

12th april 2020

2:55am

happy easter to those who celebrate :) and to those who don’t, enjoy the chocolate eggs hehe. i’ve been spending lots of my furlough leave on this website and i have been loving every second of it. so much so that i upgraded to the premium plan of neocities, and honestly i’ve considered moving over my portfolio to here too. i probably won’t on the portfolio side though, as i would have to ‘translate’ it to a static website, and change nameservers, and the list goes on. it’s all entirely doable though:)
my little piczo project has been coming alone so well!!! i‘m considering moving it to its own seperate site and keeping avenue seperate. the piczo project was the start of my web design journey, and avenue was the next chapter. then whats this chapter? the resurgence? maybe i should write some lore for this...
my next to do list for the piczo project is uploading all my old blogs from previous websites/blogs i have found. god i wish i saved them, and i wish that the original piczo website was archived properly so that i could attempt to find previous blogs of mine. same for freewebs, and awardspace... :(
i love that this pandemic has given me time to really delve into these little side projects and hobbies of mine. although i hope it never ends, i miss seeing my boyfriend. i miss going places. i miss going to the city. i think i will work like the leave is going to come to an end, just incase it does. in which case, i really hope that this piczo project will be completed soon. i can’t wait to see how the finished result looks

1st april 2020

1:33am

okay i'll update tomorrow as i am very tired it'stime forbed night x

3:57pm

i had a spark of love and inspiration and this layout is what came out of it. from start to finish it took me about 4 or 5 hours. i forgot how much i love making these layouts and these photoshop collage things... i would love to make websites like this for people allll day everyday. i remember years ago people used to do like 'website packages' from like £10 - £50 for a website layout. like entire websites dedicated for a hub to see portential website designs, and where they could email in and request a 'slot'. ahh nostalgia
i updated my lists, moved the 'at the moment' list to a new page (i'm still not sure what i think about it... still deciding i guess. i might move the sidebar back to the right hand side too) and i've been working on a piczo-looking website that will archive all my old blogs i've dug up over the years... i'm talking like 2007! speak soon x