8th November 2025
15:44 | Mood: Restless
Feeling a bit restless today. I have a big meeting on Monday to do with our Zine getting bound into an omnibus and I'm really cutting it fine to the deadline. I'm not exactly sure what to expect, maybe just a final 'price' and a final number of copies? I hope so. I'm working on an 'intro' and 'outro' page at the moment; thanking everyone for contributing to the zine, thanking the people we have met who have helped us print along the way etc. It's just a big ol' wall of text in a Google Doc at this point, I'm not even sure how we would go about printing this, will it need to be on silk paper? Or the uncoated stuff? Just doing a bit of a brain dump here I suppose.
It really matters to me that I get these thank you pages right. I want the world to know how much my friends mean to me, and how dear this project is, and every project I do, is to me.
My back has been doing better these past few weeks. I'm still very excited about my physiotherapy appointment at the end of the month. And my follow up with my doctor went very well - I've been officially excused from Jury Duty.
I think that might be all from me for today. I'll fix up the pages so that October has it's own page soon. Peace
26th October 2025
21:09 | Mood: Content
Thursday was my last day on the strong cocodamol tablets, so I'm going to have a week of OTC cocodamol (8/500mg) to 'wean' me off the codeine slowly. So far, so good. But the constipation is a literal pain in the butt. TMI, but if anyone thinks I'm talking nonsense, it's most likely because I am literally full of shit 
Toilet humour aside (lol), today has been a really good day for me:
Tasks completed:
- Washed the dishes
- Cleaned my water bottle (if you're reading this and can't remember the last time you washed yours, this is your sign to do it)
- vacuumed the floors
- folded and ironed clothes!!!! and didn't have to sit down during it!!! (did sit down for a little while afterwards though, but this is a HUGE thing for me)
- read for a bit, laid down; I'm currently reading 'Breasts and Eggs' by Mieko Kawakami. follow me on goodreads if you're there!
- repaired a pair of dungarees where the clasp had snapped off.
- sewed buttons onto a baby cardigan I've knit for my colleague
- roughly updated a biography section on a portfolio
- tracked my spends this week
- spent a little time repackaging photoshop resources for salvaged.nu
- made some tealgiht candles from left over wax from an old candle
- painted my nails!
- did a load of laundry
- did my physio for the day
I'm stoked. like, really amazed I was able to do all of this whilst listening to my body's pain level.
Tomorrow I need to schedule my physiotherapy appointment, and make a call regarding jury duty - bit concerned that being sat down for a long time might aggravate my sciatica. Not sure shuffling in a seat whilst a criminal trial is happening would be beneficial to anyone.
22nd October 2025
23:16 | Mood: glum
Pain is weird. Pain is humbling. Pain reminds me of what I can do, what I used to be able to do, and what I fear I won't be able to do in the future. It makes me catastrophize scenarios which tense me up, making the pain worse and sending me to urgent care at midnight to get a prescription of diazepam. Diazepam is weird.
It makes me worry. Sometimes it makes me happy. Sometimes I think about the previous week and realise that this current week feels better than the previous. But sometimes I sit at an odd angle when knitting and have to carefully hop back from the livingroom back to bed to lie down. Makes me worry that I've back tracked on progress, but after a full night's sleep and a trip to the bathroom pain free I feel 'fine'. Codeine is great. Amitriptyline helps. Senokot definitely helps.
Knitting is nice. I feel.. I just 'feel'. The future feels uncertain. Everything is just so weird right now.